Whores

VALENTINO | BIDS ADDIO, BITCHEZ

WWD reported earlier today that Valentino has officially resigned. After months of speculation, Valentino stated that he will show one more ready-to-wear (in October) and one more couture collection (in January) and then call it quits.

Valentino had a 3-day blow-out celebration in Rome this past July in honor of his house's 45th anniversary. Regarding the affair, the perma-tanned designer said, "It would be impossible to equal the emotion and joy over the friendship and consideration that the world showed me on that occasion... As such, I have decided that this is the perfect moment to say 'addio' (farewell) to the fashion world."

In 2002, Valentino and his long-time partner, Giancarlo Giammetti sold off the business side of their operation. While no successor has yet been named, Valentino has said that he hopes his team "would know how to continue my work in a way that would make me proud." He also added, "It's my intention to create and support institutions that promote the study of design and preserve the art of fashion." More at Forbes.com.

GILES | SECOND NEW LOOK COLLECTION IS SOLID GOLD

All the lucky lasses in London have no doubt already checked out Giles Deacon's second "Gold" diffusion collection for New Look. From the few pics I've seen online, nu-rave and 80's nostalgia are still very much alive and kicking in the UK.

Launched on August 23rd, with pieces ranging in price from 5-50 UK pounds, the line features rock tees, neon colors, satins, and bold floral and striped prints. New to this collection is a range of skinny jeans (also still very much alive and kicking) and denim shorts.

Not sure how I feel about the borderline dowdy floral and satiny pieces, but I do like the studded bracelets, the big handbag, and the black and white striped swimsuit, though it's a tad late in the season for the last one. Though according to Deacon, "This new collection is inspired by Ibiza and the long-awaited Indian summer – I want everyone to be wearing this collection to all their end of summer parties.” The lovelies at Catwalk Queen snapped a few pics of the new Gold collection here, here and here.

TOM FORD | STILL A TOOL

As all you hot asses out there know, August is typically a slow month for fashion. It's the calm before the storm of all the fall runway madness. Another constant in the fashion world - Tom Ford is still a sleazy, arrogant ass. I hate spending the few minutes to type out this tirade, but seriously, get a load of Ford's upcoming ad campaign (right) for his new fragrance, Tom Ford for Men. I know I'm just falling victim to his gimmicky, "oh-so-controversial," misogynistic schtick, but I couldn't let this one slide by. Will someone please finally tell this tasteless fucker to get over himself and get a new marketing strategy?

Yes, Tom, sex does sell, but not when it's so blatantly crass, anti-female, and attention-starved as this. There is nothing sexy nor sensual about this ad (shot by never-not-nude photog, Terry Richardson). It's just another one of Ford's pathetic attempts to try to shock. An even tackier photo from the campaign shows "the Tom Ford for Men bottle wedged between a woman's glistening thighs, with the bottle barely covering her bare genitalia." Ugh! When Ford claimed to be seeking a film career out in Hollywood after mercifully leaving YSL a few years back, he really should have considered porn. He would have become the king (or queen) of San Fernando Valley! But in terms of fashion and advertising, his flesh peddling is just so stupid and boring. Not to mention, what man who buys Tom Ford for Men is even going to look at the naked chick??? Read more at WWD.com.

TONY WILSON | MR MANCHESTER DIES

I was very saddened to learn that Anthony H. Wilson, television presenter, founder of Factory Records and the Hacienda club, proud Mancunian, and music visionary passed away Friday at the age of 57. The cause of his death is not clear as some have reported that he lost his battle with kidney cancer while others claim he had a heart attack. Regardless, the music world has lost a very important and under-appreciated figure.

A true music fan, Wilson introduced the world to various indie acts, most famously Joy Division/New Order and the Happy Mondays. He founded the notoriously unprofitable Factory Records along with the legendary Hacienda club. Michael Winterbottom's film, 24 Hour Party People, was loosely based on his life. The great Steve Coogan played Wilson. Wilson, in turn, appeared as himself interviewing Steve Coogan's character in Winterbottom's hilarious Tristam Shandy, A Cock and Bull Story in 2005.

I've always admired Wilson because he was a character - a passionate music fan, who made a major impact on the industry. He put Manchester on the map, created a lasting scene, and got exposure for the bands that he believed in and loved. He paved the way for so much in music today from the way bands sound to the way they are marketed. The music world has sadly lost one of its most influential icons. Read obituaries at Telegraph UK and BBC News.

DAFT PUNK | HARDER BETTER FASTER STRONGER!

Wowee-zowee! I've gotta jump on the bandwagon and declare the Daft Punk show last night at Keyspan Park was the BEST SHOW EVA! With an amazing, thudding soundsystem and lightshow undoubtedly visible from space, the faux-robo French duo blew everybody on Coney Island away! Every single last person at the sold out show smiled and bounced around throughout the entire set. I thought I was going to have an epileptic fit from all the bright, flashing lights - and it would have been totally worth it! Thomas Bangalter and Guy-Manuel de Homem-Christo know how to put on a show like nobody's business! See ProductShop and BrooklynVegan for setlist and pics.

Speaking of which, the Daft Punkers directed an art film called Electroma that debuted at Cannes last year. In it, two Dior Homme-clad robots travel across America on a quest to become real, live humans. The Landmark Sunshine Theater in the LES is showing it at two midnight screenings next weekend. Check it out! Read more here.

DEATH AT ONE'S ELBOW

It's been a cruel summer! So many legendary artists are passing away one after another. I've always heard that great people die in groups of three - but within the past few weeks, we've lost four. Three veteran, established, non-mainstream artists and one younger, up-and-comer. Very sad. Read about these true originals below.

-The youngest was the first to go - 35-year-old digital/video artist, Jeremy Blake went missing on July 17th, one week after discovering the body of his long-time girlfriend, Theresa Duncan, in their East Village apartment after an apparent suicide. Blake's body was found on July 22nd by fishermen in waters off of New Jersey. He was last seen walking into the ocean on a beach on the Rockaways in Queens. Blake's work was displayed in three Whitney Biennials and perhaps received the most exposure in Paul Thomas Anderson's 2002 film Punch Drunk Love. He was scheduled to show his latest work, a collaboration with Malcolm McLaren, in Washington DC in October. NYT

-On July 30th, the film world lost two masters. First, Swedish director Ingmar Bergman died at the age of 89. Writing and directing films about family, relationships, religion and death, Bergman is perhaps best know for The Seventh Seal, Persona, and Fanny and Alexander - all great films. NYT

-Also on July 30th, Italian director, Michelangelo Antonioni passed away in Rome at the age of 94. Known for being a subversive rule-breaker, Antonioni's most famous film is the gorgeous and oh-so-cool Blow Up. Though his trilogy of L'Avventura, La Notte, and L'Ecclisse are also classics. IHT

-And on August 4th the music world lost the 78-year-old, cool, velvet-voiced crooner/songwriter, Lee Hazelwood (pictured above). Best known for his slightly naughty collaborations with Nancy Sinatra, These Boots are Made for Walking and Some Velvet Morning (recently covered by Primal Scream's Bobby Gillespie and Kate Moss), Hazelwood had an incredible influence over some of today's best indie performers, including Jarvis Cocker, Nick Cave, Sonic Youth and Tindersticks. Hazelwood's last album Cake or Death was released in December 2006 and is part farewell and part celebration. It is an appropriate swansong for the bad-ass cult star. Also worth picking up is 2002's Total Lee! The Songs of Lee Hazelwood performed by various indie artists. Guardian

TOP OF THE POP(S) CULTURE

-Marc Jacobs, Karl Lagerfeld and Alber Elbaz (right) were at Colette recently posing beside their Simpsons likenesses created by Julius Preite for Bazaar. While Alber seems to be having a jolly time, Marc and Karl do not look amused. Does the kaiser sort of remind anyone else of an haute couture version of Mr. Burns? See here.

-Poor Pete Doherty! Crack sure does make him do some stupid ass things! NME reports that Kate Moss' ex is missing the supermodel. "It was love at first meet," he reportedly told a tabloid. "She said she'd get a 'P' tattoo, and I'd get a 'K'... Soon afterwards she said, 'I'll marry you'. I fucked that up, didn't I!" No shit, Einstein! The article also claims that Doherty admits to committing a "rather a rash gesture" by proposing to some random French chick on the same day that Moss dumped him! He's reportedly said about the situation, "She's gone back to Paris and I don't know what to do." Well, that sure as hell won't win you back Kate, you dumb fuck!

The piece also reveals that Moss co-wrote a number of songs on the new Babyshambles album. Even sadder, in another story, NME claims that Pete has bleached his hair blond. Eek! Read more here.

-So Kate fancies herself a rockstar, eh? She is supposedly planning to record an album with Pete's producer. A catty source has reportedly said of the project, "It'll be great revenge if she sells more [records] than him." Erm...I don't think Pete needs to worry about that happening. Read here.

-Ready, Art Brut?! Check out Eddie Argos and crew performing Direct Hit on Conan O'Brien here.

-Product Shop NYC has a link to Yeah Yeah Yeahs performing on Letterman here. Karen O looks f-f-fierce from the waist up, though the fringy skirt and boots and busy tights don't seem to bother Dave. Be sure to check out the end of the video when he greets the band. He won't let go of gorgeous, giggly Karen's hand! Stop slobbering, dirty, old Dave! I guess his crushing on Connie Chung days are way over...

TWENTY8TWAT | SIENNA & SAVANNAH'S LINE DEBUTS

-Sienna skank Miller and her designer sister, Savannah, debuted their new clothing line Twenty8Twelve atop the Gramercy Park hotel Thursday night. The line, named for Sienna's birthday - not that she's self-involved or anything - consists of 80 pieces and was pretentiously titled "An Anthology of Rebellion." The sisters wore unspectacular pieces from the collection to the soiree. Ubiquitous party-girl, Agyness Deyn (right), attended looking impossibly cool and gorgeous in a white, vintage, fringy flapper dress toughened up with black boots. Unlike her sibling, Savannah possesses true fashion cred being a graduate of Central Saint Martin's and having worked for Alexander McQueen. See more here.

-I don't know if you've noticed, but I don't really care for Sienna. What with her fucking anybody she thinks will boost her "acting" career and her annoying boho-shit style. So needless to say, I was amused by this tidbit from Vogue UK claiming that Sienna will be co-starring in an upcoming production of A Woman Of No Importance along with Jessica Biel. According to a source the Kate/Edie wannabe is feeling rather insecure. "Sienna is worried because Jessica is so stunning and in the past has been voted the sexiest woman alive... Sienna has been asking guys whether they think Jessica has the looks edge over her." Cause you know, it's not like she's self-involved or anything... Read here (scroll down).

-And big news for the lil' man was announced today. Prada is selling 100% of Azzedine Alaia's company back to him. Alaia's skin-tight, strappy, bandage dresses have been incredibly influential and popular the past couple of seasons and according to WWD, the brand "posted sales growth of about 30 percent" or about $16.63 million this past year. The Prada Group will continue to produce his footwear and leather goods. Yay Alaia! Read here.

MUSIC NEWS

-Marc Jacobs has reportedly recruited the bald, scrawny and pasty Michael Stipe as the latest celeb to feature in an ad campaign. I'm sorry, seeing this photo of Stipe does not compel me to run up to Bleecker Street and buy Marc. Ew. I just threw up a little...

-Also, this story of a catty/bitchy Jacobs constantly talking smack about John Galliano makes me like him a little less. First the MySpace page and now this? What, are you still in high school, Marc? Read here.

-Poor Beth Ditto won't be a high street fashion designer like her bffs, Kate Moss and Giles Deacon afterall. New Look has denied that the singer will be designing a plus-size line for them. I guess the company decided that jumbo-sized, sateen, leopard-print pillow cases with head and arm holes cut out just aren't marketable for them. Awww, bummer! Story here.

-So is it me or has Beth become a big star-fucker? I mean, check her out here mugging on the cover(s) of URB with the biggest and ugliest star-fucker of them all! Ew. I just threw up again...

-I couldn't drag my lazy ass out to Williamsburg last night to see M.I.A. perform at Studio B, but according to Style.com, Ms. Maya Arulpragasam had some spiffy concert t-shirts for sale featuring the singer in a silver silkscreened print on a purple American Apparel tee. More here (scroll down).

-A hand-made kilt fashioned with the official White Stripes tartan?! Best concert merch eva! Read here.

THE STYLE COUNCIL

I wanna drink Stella with Paul Weller (and Grahammy) on a beach...

Just a little eye-candy for your lazy, summer Friday afternoon.  Recent collaborators, Paul Weller and Graham Coxon, as shot by Lawrence Watson for the July 7th issue of NME.  I love the expressions on the musicians faces.  It seems as if Coxon is laughing uncontrollably at Weller's mammoth Prada man-bag, while Weller appears to be miffed and mumbling, "I don't give a toss!  I'm Paul Weller, bitch!"  Loves it!

CRIMES OF FASHION

-So...many...colors! We adore you, Aggy, but what the fuck is this get-up (right)? I'm going to blame Henry Holland, who is lurking in the background, of course (if there's an It girl around, he's never far behind), for this. And what's up with your foot, girlfriend?

-Speaking of toxic (ha, get it?) colors, check out Britney's bra/bikini top. Oy! Cover it up, sista!

-Then again, Brit's not looking any better fully clothed.

-I can see prison totally rehabilitated Paris Hilton... If you want to look like a trannie hooker, Paris, fine. But don't get your poor yorkie involved, okay? Click here.

-Tara Reid is still a trainwreck. And apparently her boobs were in a trainwreck! See here.

-Damn, Sienna! Do the brows match the bush? And I thought she was a natural blonde... Go here.

-Oh, Courtney. Not even the biggest sunglasses in the world would hide your botched collagen job. And to think she has to wake up to this puss every morning...

FASHION FAVES | ISABELLA AND IRINA

-New York Magazine's Amy Larocca wrote a great profile on the late Isabella Blow.  The fashion world still can't seem to get over the untimely (though not entirely unexpected) passing of the unique muse and visionary.  I've only gotten through half the article so far, but it's pretty interesting and has some good pics (like the one at the right of Blow and Alexander McQueen).  It reveals how loved Issie was by many and gives us a clearer idea of her husband, Detmar. It also shows how absolutely shallow and stupid some fashion "insiders" really are.  For example, Plum Sykes' comment about the often discussed story of how Blow discovered model Sophie Dahl after seeing her sobbing on a street corner - "We all just thought she was a fat teenager."  Yeah, and we all just think you're an airhead twat, you dim prune!

Also telling is an unidentified fashion "friend" who responded to one of Blow's many suicide threats with, "Look, Issie, if you really mean to kill yourself, there’s a pool out back, go drown!”  Real nice, asshole!  Read the full article here.

-And Style.com has a quick Q&A with an up-and-coming, already-much-loved fashion icon, Irina Lazareanu.  See here (scroll down to about the eighth item).

DESIGNER COLLABORATIONS | ON OR OFF TARGET?

-I am so underwhelmed by Libertine's collection for Target.  Lily Pulitzer-like pieces + tired skulls + lazy shapes = no fucking thanks!  I'm sure we'll be seeing lots of these pieces on the clearance racks.  See for yourself here.

-The Devi Kroell faux snakeskin bags for Target, on the other hand, look pretty good online.  I may have to take a look-see in person to see if I should pick up a gold hobo (right) and/or anthracite tote for bumming around.  See here.

--The fab Style Bubble reports that Henry Holland has collaborated with UK shoe company, Kickers, on a series of more t-shirts with silly slogans along with some ghastly looking footwear.  Go here.  Methinks Mr. Holland and his "house" have seen their 15 minutes of fashion fame and need to retreat back into their neon hued K-hole.  Ripping off Katharine Hamnett's famous political tees and clinging onto British "It" girls seem to be Holland's primary talents.

THE SIMPSONS DO PARIS

The marketing/pr team handling The Simpsons movie is working some serious overtime (almost as much as Posh and Beck's people!).  Not only did they have a contest to select which city of Springfield would host the premiere of the movie (Vermont won the honour), and provide the ultimate time-waster - "Create Your Own Simpsons" character on simpsonsmovie.com (I've made every coworker in my office into a Springfieldian!), they also got the spazzes at Bazaar on board the hype-machine for a hilarious spread. 

Julius Preite illustrated the Simpson family experiencing Paris Fashion Week accompanied by an animated Linda Evangelista.  The spread features the family in terrific scenes like Marge and Linda decked out in Versace alongside Donatella; Marge and Linda modelling Chanel couture for Karl Lagerfeld and Homer dressed like Karl (above); little, preachy, self-righteous Lisa trying on Lanvin whilst Alber Elbaz inspects her plastic, white pearls; a hilarious pic of Marge's sisters, Patty and Selma, wearing Viktor & Rolf's "scaffolding" dresses; Linda and Marge walking arm in arm with Jean Paul Gaultier whilst toting wee Maggie in a Birkin bag; and finally the family sitting in the front row as Marc Jacobs takes his bow at a Louis Vuitton show.  Brilliant!  Fashionista scanned all the pages from the August issue.  See here.

CRIMES OF FASHION

Andre Leon Talley is championing the male muumuu for some god-forsaken reason. At Valentino's recent 45th anniversary celebrations in Rome, Talley wore not one, but TWO of these unbecoming eyesores. Does Anna Wintour know that her editor-at-large is parading around looking very large but not at all in charge in acres of hideously patterned fabrics? I'm pretty sure Wintour would bust a nut if she saw Talley in these Maude-like get-ups. Is he trying to make an anti-fashion statement? Or has motherfucker just gone blind?

Look, Andre, you've got dozens of designers desperate for exposure at your disposal. I'm sure they'd be more than happy to stitch up a lovely bespoke suit or whip up some dapper duds for your six foot seven frame if you asked. You gots to stop wearing these kaftans! You look ginormous and just plain ridiculous... and like you've said, "Miss Anna don't like fat people." See more here.