My Weblog

U. of NORTHERN COLORADO | The day Rudy went bad

This is just like when Elizabeth Berkeley pushes Gina Gershon down the stairs in Showgirls!  Or more aptly, Nancy Kerrigan and Tonya Harding...

From the Greeley Trib: In a bizarre string of events, the University of Northern Colorado's reserve punter lost any chance to kick on the field this year after an attack on the team's first-stringer.

Mitch Cozad faces charges of second-degree assault after being arrested by the Evans Police Department on Tuesday night on accusations that he stabbed Rafael Mendoza in his kicking leg on Monday night.

FULL STORY

BRANDEIS UNIVERSITY | Welcome back, Masturbater!

Hello class. Welcome back.  How was your summer?  Oh mine?  Well, thank you for asking!  I spent the summer digging up an 18th century carriage house in New Hamp... Oh, you're not listening. Sigh.

Could we just settle down? Please put your cell phones away.  Now your BlackBerries.  What the hell do you need BlackBerries for, you're college sophomores.  Listen, you and your parents are paying good money for you to listen to my lecture on the architecture of canvas tents during the Great Awakening.

Oh fuck it. 

Here's a scintillating tale from my alma mater.  It's right up your alley, you dirty-minded slackers...

****************************
For at least the third time since last fall, Waltham and Brandeis police have failed to catch a man allegedly seen masturbating by the tennis courts.

Michael Vulfovich '07, who plays for the men's varsity tennis team, said he saw a man two weeks ago sitting on the staircase behind the tennis courts masturbating. Vulfovich was preparing to give a tennis lesson to a young boy who is a friend of his family's.

"I was just like, 'that guy is definitely sitting there and jacking off,'" Vulfovich said, adding that luckily the boy hadn't arrived yet.

ENJOY!

DUKE UNIVERSITY | Many excuses, lame regrets

Duke women's lacrosse shows support for accused rapists...

KOLLEGE DAILY | Insert cock here

Hazing.  It's not just for Greeks. 

Check out these amazing photos of jocks tormenting each other, getting drunk, wearing diapers, humping male strippers, and engaging in unironic homoerotic behavior, courtesy of Badjocks.com

Catholic University Girl's Lacrosse
"Twat Eater" and "I do anal."

Quinnipiac University Men's Baseball
Jocks dancing in diapers.

UC Santa Barbara Girl's Lacrosse
Asswriting

Wake Forest Women's Volleyball
Classy: Gal gagged, blindfolded and tied to a pole with a penis drawn on her chest.

Elon University Men's Baseball
Guys in bras, bending over, drinking what looks like a Tupperware bowl full of cum.

More of future assholes of America here...

U. of IOWA | Hawkeyes in cell-gate!

We all know that college athletes get perks: SUVs, their very own nerd to take tests for them, a lifetime supply of Lotrimin...

They also get discounted cell-phone accessories in exchange for bowl tickets. 

According to the Daily Iowan, documents obtained from an unemployment-compensation appeals hearing indicate that former IPCS Wireless employee Jeremy Reed sold a $79.99 headset and a $49.99 phone charger to a customer for 1 penny each, among other charges.

At his hearing, Reed said the football tickets were "gifts" from a "friend." The judge determined the "friend" was a football player, and preferential treatment was provided to the athletes in exchange for gifts and other benefits.

Full Story

DUKE UNIVERSITY | LAX DNA

Just like many think it's a bit too early for Jesse Jackson to be offering to pay the alleged Duke lacrosse rape victim's college tuition, Kollege Daily thinks its a bit too early to be calling her the next Tawana Brawley.

I'm wondering, as a non-scientist, if the dudes wore condoms (which would make sense) would there even be DNA evidence? Has anyone addressed this?

DUKE UNIVERSITY | Lacrosse players fucked

For those strong of stomach, here's the email  (and other police evidence) from now disgraced Duke University lacrosse team member and alleged psycho rapist Ryan McFadyen, via The Smoking Gun.

Shockingly, asshole behavior from these guys was nothing new...

For those living under a rock, a bunch of white Duke lacrosse players hired some strippers and then allegedly brutally gang-raped one of them.

GEORGE MASON | Holy crap! George Mason headed for Final Four

Fortunes were made, knees were broken, hearts shattered and wildest dreams came true when George Mason defeated UConn Friday night in a cuticle biter that brought the eleventh-seeded commuter school thismuch closer to the NCAA championship.

As some guy on NPR said this morning, if George Mason goes all the way, it's going to be comparable to the "Miracle on Ice" 1980 Lake Placid Olympics in terms of sheer odds and tenacity.

Now if you'll excuse me, I've got something in my eye... 

BRADLEY U. and GEORGE MASON | But did they beat the spread?

Area bookies pay up big as eleventh-seed commuter school George Mason and thirteeth-seeded Bradley University defeat the beyond way-favored North Carolina and Pittsburgh, respectively.

U. of MARYLAND | Headline of the Week

Freshmen to get head start in fall

No wonder admissions are up!

Story here...